imageOne of the people I currently work with in food retail is about to leave and go to work in the customer care department for a major clothes retailer. She will be responsible for answering customer queries and complaints, via e-mail and social media channels.

Putting aside the fact that her customer care skills are negligible and she has a reputation, of her own making, of hating each and every customer that walks into the store, it’s difficult to work out how she managed to get this new job. She obviously has a good interview technique.

When I asked her what she was going to be doing in her new role she outlined the duties and stated “I could ring them [customers] up, but that isn’t going to happen. Jeez no. Can’t stand the fuckers so I definitely won’t be speaking to them on the phone. It’ll all be done behind a screen.”

Later that day she mentioned that her spelling was rubbish and I pointed out she could use spellchecker (a cop out and it doesn’t encourage people to improve their abilities but is available to the lazy) and she nodded knowingly comforted by this fact.

I then asked what her grammar was like. She looked at me with a very confused look on her face. “What’s grammar?” she asked. I explained what it was and cited some examples. She replied “Oh, I’ll use a grammar checker as I have no idea what the difference between there, their and they’re is and can’t be arsed to learn.”

Let’s see if she passes her probation period. And I think the retailer needs to review its recruitment processes.

In the meantime I’m going to apply for the recently advertised position of brain surgeon at my local hospital. How hard can it be?


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